Yep. Just like the song says. I love Disney movies but Frozen in particular is 100% on point. Lately I’ve noticed that so many people around me are trying so hard to have control on the things around them to have some sense of normalcy. I see it causing them a lot of anxiety and stress. So much so that I worry for their physical and mental well being.
I told a friend tonight that I learned long ago that not every person is good or going to be what you expect them to be. We can either accept them for who they are and be okay with what we get from them or we can choose not to. Which often means cutting off relationships. The latter is not always feasible so that leaves us with accepting people for who they are.
That’s not to say that people can’t change. Or that we shouldn’t try to express our feelings with them. But ultimately an individual does not change unless they have great self awareness. We cannot change them. They must change for themselves.
In order to find inner peace though we must be willing to let go of the expectations we have for others. The only thing we can control are the expectations we have for ourselves.
If you find yourself feeling anxious, pause for a moment and ask yourself if this is something you can control or if your are trying to control a situation or others. If your answer is that you are trying to control a situation or others then you need to take a deep breath and say to yourself, “I let go of what I can’t control.” And move on.
I know it’s difficult for many of us to not feel anxious right now. But now more than ever it is imperative to take care of our mental well being. That often entails vital self reflection and making some changes within ourselves. Fortunately that IS something we have control over.
Let’s face it, corona isn’t going away any time soon.
I know this is a difficult notion for a lot of people. And some people don’t even believe in the virus. I get it. But that still doesn’t change the state of the world.
So make your own happy place. For me that meant being able to enjoy my beautiful yard and patio. I always feel calmer outside and I wanted to create a space for me and my family so that we could feel at ease and enjoy each other’s company.
Even my husband has said, “I appreciate the space you’ve created.”
Our home is our safe place. Sanctuary looks different for everyone. I strongly recommend figuring out what speaks to you and allows you to feel respite and then creating that space for yourself.
It has been a chaotic 6 months during a global pandemic.
And many people are looking for the answer to the above question.
I’m not sure there is an answer. But I know the answer for myself and my family is to take it a day at a time. We can’t change the world around us. But we can control how we react. I’m tired of feeling mad or frustrated and I’m even tired of feeling exhausted. Because I work as nurse in a bustling family practice coronavirus is a part of my every day life.
I’m over it like everyone else. But I stay vigilant about guidelines and precautions because that is the right thing to do. I’m finding ways to clear my head and ground myself. My home has become my sanctuary. Gardening has become a passion and sewing helps me clear my head. Simplicity is what makes things feel “normal.” We are all seeing a new normal. In a few short weeks our girls will be going to school in a hybrid format, 2 days a week in person and 3 days at home. They’ll wear masks and face shields and sit 6 feet apart from their friends.
So where DO we go from here???
I say we go forward. One step at a time. Side by side with our loved ones. Finding our peace. Protecting each other.
A close friend once told me “just protect your net” meaning I can’t change the things around me but I can protect my family. (We’re a hockey family if you couldn’t tell)